


At his side when he died

by WiseGirlWinchester



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: I COULDN'T HELP IT, I'm Sorry, John Dies, Lams - Freeform, M/M, Oneshot, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-09
Packaged: 2018-10-30 01:44:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10866429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WiseGirlWinchester/pseuds/WiseGirlWinchester
Summary: If Alex had been at his side when he died this is how it would have gone I think.This was inspired by deis video hear >> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5zCEhA5UWEits beautiful watch it.





	At his side when he died

"JOHN!" he screamed, running to the side of the injured man. He laid on a makeshift cot in this cesspit that passed for a military hospital. He was curled on one side with his hands pressed against his poorly bandaged and bleeding wound. The doctor had cut off the bottom of his jacket in order to reach his injury, leaving the sleeves and collar. Three bloody bullets lay on the board beside him. His normally severe pony tail had been reduced to a sloppy mess of brown splayed across the straw mat. His dirty freckled face was twisted in agony and streaked with tears, his eyes screwed shut. Alexander skidded to his side, his frantic hands traced John's frame, his arms, his legs, his head, smoothing over his soft curls and whispering sweet nothings. John moaned in pain. Alex felt his throat burn and tears gather in his eyes. They spilled over, mingling with John’s own as they slid down his face. John groaned again and opened his eyes, barely enough to see who was there. He was greeted with the panicked face of his best friend, his hair was flying out of his hurried pony tail drifting into his beautiful, intelligent eyes. Those eyes were terrified. "A..ale...x" John grated out. He winced at the sound of his own voice. Alex's eyes brightened with hope.  
"John!? Oh my God John what happened!? John!? J-ohn..." His voice broke. He was still crying. Alex ran his hand over John's cheek softly. He wiped away the little trail of blood that was leaking from the corner of his mouth with his thumb.  
"Al...ex.." Alexanders frantic eyes immediately snapped back to John’s. He couldn't help but notice they were foggy, their usual vibrant, happy green dulled with pain and confusion. "The war? Did...." He hacked violently the coughs racking his body as he struggled to breath. The front of Alex's best jacket was sprayed with little red droplets but he didn't care  
"John, John! stay with me!" He said frantically as John turned his head away to cough again. When the coughing stopped John's body was shaking violently and the bandage on his stomach was almost soaked through. Alex's hope flickered like a candle. Suddenly, he stood and screamed. He grabbed the empty water cup on the board beside John, and spinning, threw it with all his power at the wall. The cup shattered into a thousand pieces on the floor as Alex collapsed, with it his knees hit the floor beside John’s cot and he buried his face in this hands. "It’s not fair..." he whispered, then he raised his head "It’s NOT FAIR!" he screamed at the sky. John coughed again more softly this time and Alex's attention was drawn to his beautiful freckled face, the bandage on his cheek, the blood on his lips. Why did it have to happen to his John? He wished selfishly, hatefully, that it had been any of the other men. Anyone but John. He stretched out his hands and gently carefully pulled John into his arms. He cradled his head gently and held his body to him. The pain left John's face a little but now Alexander could feel how warm he was and he could see the various scrapes and wounds littering his body.  
He knew John wasn't going to make it. And then hope shattered like that cup, into a thousand, broken, little fragments. All Alex could do was hold him close and cry. John snuggled into Alex's warmth as best he could. He was so cold. He felt safer just being close to him. John coughed again and he saw Alex wince. Dull green eyes searched the face of the man he loved but they didn't know what they were looking for. He saw Alex's mouth move before he heard the words "I wasn't there to save you." Alex's eyes were closed. "I'm so sorry John." A bloodied, callused, determined, freckled hand sought Alex's face.  
John's soft touch made Alex's beautiful shattered eyes open again, tears still dripped onto John's face but it was okay because Alex was here. "At least," John cleared his throat and smiled his brilliant happy smile. The one Alex had fallen in love with. "At least yours is the last face I ever see." the hand slipped away from Alex's stunned face as the smile faded, too painful to continue. Then Alex's face hardened and he just didn't care any more.  
"I love you John." It was John's turn to look stunned but then that slipped away too, any facial expression just too hard to maintain. All the blood was rushing to the wound in his stomach, he was losing consciousness, the room was going dark, and he could barely make his mouth move all of it hurt pain was blocking out almost everything but he had to get these words out. "I love you too...." Green eyes closed, John's body went limp. "No..." Alex whispered "No, no, no, no..." he searched for a pulse but found none. Blood was still soaking into his jacket hot and sticky. "John, John! JOHN!" he was screaming, shaking "DON'T LEAVE ME! PLEASE! DON'T LEAVE ME!" he sobbed holding John’s body closer "No John please...."  
Later that day, when they came to take Lieutenant Colonel Laurens' body away, it was draped in someone's best military jacket. But the jacket's abdomen was stained red with the blood of the man it had been placed so lovingly over and it would never be worn again.

**Author's Note:**

> Yay for that over dramatic bit of trash called my first oneshot this wasn't edited so pls don't hate me 
> 
> loves for reading!  
> (ps kudos make me happy but comments make me REALLY happy)


End file.
